Out with the old and in with the new?

The last few weeks have been pretty hectic. I had my first plane journey as an Ostomate, spent three days in Krakow and also have been contending with the general rigours and social engagements of modern life. By which I mean The Masters – my annual journey in to the golf scene. First up was Krakow. I was best man, so had the arduous task of getting nine men to Southend and on to a plane by 7am on a Friday morning. Having done that we then spent the next few days drinking cheap Polish beer and smoking cheap Polish cigarettes which Boris coped with magnificently. In fact I was extremely impressed that my body managed to keep up with the late nights and heavy consumption. There were no gut based ill effects and I ate a wide variety of Polish delicacies. We also managed to shoot an AK47 and visit Auschwitz so there was a whole host of emotions going on. Having made it back just about in one piece it was time for a hard detox which was spectacularly ruined by The Masters. Which as usual was a pleasure to watch yet did nothing to stem the beer and cigarette intake. But fear not, a change is coming!

I have been managing to put off doing any exercise whatsoever. There has always been an excuse or a reason. Surgery soon, to much going on, no stoma belt. The latter being the main issue, not having an Ostomy belt to keep things tight for running or cycling etc. Also smoking really puts me off exercise. Much easier to just go for a smoke in the sun rather than donning the cycling gear and pounding it for 45 minutes. However, a post Masters detox is definitely in order. I have received two Ostomy belts in the post. Completely free from Alphamed who handle my equipment and bags etc. Both belts are fantastic. I have one for general exercise which will make running a lot less flappy and should keep everything in place. The second is a high calibre action belt which is waterproof and quite protective so swimming is a strong possibility and it will provide me with some self esteem when I am nuding it up in Crete.

So now all that is required is some will power to nullify the smoking and some even stronger will power to get training again. The weather is definitely nice enough to be cycling to work and the only thing holding me back is fitness, confidence and the lack of a hair drier. No, not for my hair… or my beard. I don’t fancy walking around with a post shower soggy bag for the first hour or so of work. I don’t really know another option so I may have to just suck it up and get used to it. Or keep not cycling. Damn, it is too easy to not do it. I just need to remember the pleasures of riding through the dappled sun light of south London rather than standing in the sweaty darkness of the underground. Well this weekend I have planned a bike ride on Saturday afternoon which will hopefully be a positive experience. Any advice regarding the hair drier situation would be very welcome!

So a change is required and will hopefully be forthcoming. In the upcoming weekends I have trips to the Brecon Beacons and a return to the Lake District planned. Back to back weekends of some hill walking and scrambling and nights spent in a tent. Perhaps consecutive weekends wasn’t the best idea but it is just the way the weekends fall. I will definitely have to take it easy and realise that my strength will not be as good as it was last year – when I was sick. On the other hand. How hard can it be? I will just go slowly. I will still make all the peaks I am planning. Not quite sure where I relieve myself. Off the beaten track and dig a hole like an animal or into a box and carry it around? A well sealed box… I will also be camping close to the toilet blocks as I don’t fancy a long trek to the toilet at 4am on a cold April morning. Just another thing to think about and another few quirks of living with Boris. Bring it on!


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